It took me a long time to figure out what fruit I was.
You know in fashion magazines where they have those "The Best Clothes for Your Body Shape" features and they show what jeans work with pear-shaped women and apple-shaped women and carrot-shaped women and so on? They're in practically every magazine, and while they most likely mean well—in that they acknowledge that different body types look better in certain types of clothes/different trends/etc.—I always struggled to figure out what fruit my body most resembled.
Maybe I'm a pear; I have a small chest and larger hips, but I didn't feel particularly large-bottomed in the way they were suggesting pears had to be. I have a smaller waist but the chest-waist-hips ratio isn't so varied that I'm what you would consider to be curvy. I'm kind of skinny, I guess, but I don't have a thigh gap. I am tall, but I feel like that isn't really a shape (tall girls can be skinny or curvy or full-figured) and I'm not so outrageously tall that I have to wear "tall" sizes or anything like that. I don't really know what "shape" I am, and for the longest time I was disappointed that these articles were of little help to me. I wanted to know what clothes would be the most flattering on me, and I was left without any real answers.
But recently I've come to a shocking realization: I am not fruit-shaped, I am Lindsey-shaped, and that is who I need to be dressing for. Not some generalized idea of body types. I understand why magazines must generalize; they can't have a million different options for each individual reader, no matter how much I wish that were a possibility. They are suggestions for what may be most flattering to you, but they are not hard and fast truths.
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| Taylor swift knows how to accentuate her long legs with mini skirts and high-waisted shorts |
So I learned to dress not for a shape, but for my own personal body. I've come to terms with what I like about my body and what could be improved. My legs are nice but I'm self-conscious about my thighs, I have a skinny waist but an equally-small chest, and I absolutely love my collarbone. It's a weird thing to pinpoint as a favorite part of me, but I've always thought I've had nice shoulders and a good collarbone, so whatever, if I like it and I think it looks good, I'm going to accentuate that.
And that's what we need to do. Focus on the parts of you that make you feel good. Yes, ideally I will one day look in the mirror and love every inch of my body, and most days I feel pretty good about it, but there are always moments of self-consciousness and days when I am more likely to focus on the flaws than I am the parts that I like. So for now, while I'm still working on developing a healthy relationship with my body and myself, I'm going to focus on what I love about myself and I'm going to play those parts up with what I wear.
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| Mindy Kaling plays up her curves with waist-defining dresses in bright, bold colors |
Because I love my collarbone and my shoulders, I've started gravitating towards square necklines that hit high on the neck and swoop down low on the sides. I've stopped stressing about not having large breasts and not looking like a Victoria's Secret model and started wearing styles that look flattering on a smaller chest. I've embraced the fact that if I want, I can get away with not wearing a bra. I wear high-waisted, full skirts that highlight my waist and minimize my hips and thighs. I've played up the parts of me that I love rather than stressing on the parts that I don't.
Since I've started changing the way I approach dressing myself, I feel so much more confident with my outfits and empowered when I'm out and about. So go ahead, accentuate the positive, and dress for you, not for a generalized shape.
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I love hearing your thoughts! Thanks for reading! ♥︎Lindsey